Hope sent a team off to Sudan again today.

Dave and John Jefferson this time.

We raised over $25,000 last year and didn’t spend it all when the team went in September.

So basically they are going back to spend the rest.

Every last penny.

On food for people in and around the border region who are starving.

But also to bring them the Bread of Life.

To share Jesus.

Our only true Hope.

In a world that continues to fall short.

We’ve set up a 24-hour prayer chain and it brings great comfort to know that the trip will be prayed for around the clock.

If you’re part of this prayer chain or interested in praying, here are some initial requests:

* Health and Safety

* Endurance and Hydration (outside temps average 110 degrees)

* Wisdom and Favor over the Logistics of the food purchase and delivery

For more information, you can read the Hope 4 Sudan blog here.

You can also follow @Hope4Sudan on Instagram, @Hope4sudanblog on Twitter and/or “like” Hope, San Mateo on Facebook for updates and prayer requests throughout the trip.

I’m so thankful for a church family who loves people like Jesus does.

For a husband and pastor who loves people the way he tells other people to.

And for the body of Christ who loves our family as we stay behind.

I struggle to find words here.

And quite honestly, I want to avoid them.

But doing so would rob God of glory.

And I’d rather not do that.

So I share my little story.

And I will be honest.

I’m very nervous.

I feel unqualified.

Many women have struggled far longer, some forever.

I don’t feel fit to share.

I’m not trying to make this my platform.

I’m not claiming to be an expert.

But I keep being brought back to God’s glory.

And my thankfulness.

And joy.

In answered prayers.

In lessons learned.

Rewind to November of 2010.

We learned we’d be adding a third little one to this house of crazy.

Shortly thereafter, we lost that baby.

I was surprised and sad.

But convinced God would give us another baby.

Quickly.

Because all our other pregnancies had happened that way.

But that wasn’t the case.

Months of waiting became years of waiting.

And this past fall, I had given up hope.

Convinced that God’s plan for us was to be a family of four.

And I was learning to be content in that.

But, really I wasn’t.

I wasn’t waiting well.

I was impatient.

And bratty.

Self-absorbed.

Jealous of pregnant friends.

Ugly.

But even though I wasn’t reflecting Jesus well,

I have never been closer to Him.

I’ve never prayed more.

Leaned more.

Relied more.

We had lots of chats, Jesus and I.

And this past Christmas, we learned of a great blessing.

In early September of this year, Lord-willing, we’ll welcome a new little baby into our home.

I am thrilled.

Overjoyed.

Thankful.

So very thankful.

For this precious new life.

But also for what I have learned while waiting.

Lean on Him always.

Not just in the valleys.

Don’t be a brat.

It’s ugly.

Rejoice with your friends.

Even when it’s hard.

And you’d rather poke their pregnant eyes out.

Be gracious to other women around you.

Not many knew of my struggle because I felt weak sharing.

And so many have more painful stories.

Be careful with your words, pregnant ladies.

Be careful with your complaints.

Many women would give anything to feel morning sickness.

Women that have struggled with miscarriage and infertility,

SHARE YOUR STORIES.

Please.

They are so powerful and give such hope.

See them as a gift.

Yes.

This new little baby is a HUGE gift.

But the waiting was more of one.

I pray Jesus never lets me forget that.

Our card this year.

I know.

It’s borderline blasphemous with all the baseball worship at Christmastime.

But it’s one of my favorite ones yet.

And if there’s any doubt?

Jesus’ birth means more to us than the Giants do.

Which means we REALLY love Jesus.

Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and Happy New Year!

2013 is gonna be a good one.

{Card by KatyGirl Designs}

A certain little girl in our house loves race horses.

And movies about race horses.

We’ve watched Secretariat well over 100 times over the course of the summer.

An old hymn is the heart of the soundtrack.

And we have it memorized.

God, in His providence, put it there.

Because it has zero to do with horses and everything to do with Jesus.

Kayla was baptized by her dad last Sunday.

And while she expressed a clear desire to take this next step,

I was anxious about her having a proper understanding of what she was doing.

But I am so thankful.

God gave us the grace to share, explain and teach our little girl through a movie.

A story about a horse.

With a song about Jesus and redemption and baptism as the backdrop.

Being baptized doesn’t mean we’ve won the race.

It lets everyone know we’re running.

You guys.

Look.

 And you know?

I’m not surprised.

I am thrilled.

Thankful.

So very thankful.

But not surprised.

God is good.

And He provides.

 Jon P. and John J. left SFO on the 11th.

And met a team of two others.

The four men arrived safely in Sudan and will head up to the Yida refugee camp sometime today.

And then move up into the mountain region over the next few days.

Please pray.

For safety.

Clear passage.

That rains would stop and roads would be accessible.

Lack of injuries and sickness.

For those starving and sick.

For families that have been separated.

It is a desperate situation there.

For grace and chances to share about the Living Bread.

That God would continue to work miracles.

Thanks to all of you.

Those who donated.

Those who opened shops and gave away your proceeds.

Those who shared of the need and the story.

Those who prayed and continue to pray.

Starving people will receive food in the next few days because God used you.

And on behalf of our family and our church, we are grateful.

So grateful.

We’ve set up a daily 24 Hour Prayer Chain in 15 minute increments.

There are still a few open spots.

If you’re interested, please comment below and indicate a time of day preference.

And again, thank you.

It’s a privilege to serve Him with you.

To be the Church, together.

Dave and the team made it safely to Africa.

We were able to chat last night for me/this morning for him via FaceTime.

Kayla told him about the faux gold nuggets that Pop Pop gave her yesterday.

And asked if there were goats there.

Gold and goats.

That’s about right.

Ashlyn asked if he got his shots yet.

She wanted to go with him until she heard about the vaccination requirements.

Lightweight.

God is doing amazing things in Sudan.

I love that I can kind of see it.

And I can’t wait to hear more when they are home.

I went to a funeral on Saturday.

For a dear soul that taught Sunday School in the church that I grew up in.

I was blessed to have her.

And blessed by the Jolly Ranchers she gave me when I memorized verses.

Her family spoke of her devotion to Christ and His Word.

How they would recall hearing her pray out loud, early in the morning.

Very often she had her bible in hand.

Any time she talked with you, she looked you in the eyes and gently grabbed your arm.

I remember that about her.

And she did not have an easy life.

Much harder than mine.

Yet she remained loyal.

Devout.

Committed.

On the drive back, I got to thinking.

What will my kids remember about me?

What will they say after I’m gone?

That I always had my bible in my hand?

Or that I was always holding my phone.

Am I praying out loud in the morning or ever?

Am I intensionally teaching them?

And, more importantly, am I LIVING what I’m teaching them?

Or just surviving until bedtime.

A good dose of conviction was received on the 505.

And one I’m going to listen to.

I want to be remembered for my devotion to Christ.

Not the things of this world.

Now hear me.

Obviously, technology is not evil or bad.

I actually think it’s a gift from the Lord, if used rightly.

Fellowship on steroids.

I love it.

I have no plans to give it up.

I just want to use it less.

I don’t want to be remembered for it.

Even if I really, really, REALLY love it when we’re 9077 miles apart.

Thank you, 505 and your 8 zillion bugs.

Thank you, Dorothea Jacobs.

God used you to teach me something.

Unrelated.

This.

Link up.

When Dave gets excited about something, he gets chatty.

Baseball season about to start?

Chatty.

The Niners potentially (and unsuccessfully) acquiring Manning?

Chatty.

Sovereignty of God, predestination, propitiation, etc.?

CHATTY.

He’s also one of those weirdos that likes being convicted.

Which means he’s chatty about his convictions.

Which means I get convicted.

Which means I. LOVE. BEING. A. PASTORS. WIFE!!!!!!

Kidding.

I really do love being a pastor’s wife.

He shared about the above verse last night at prayer meeting.

And I can’t stop thinking about it.

It’s so easy to be a hearer, right?

We are trained to be hearers.

Listen to your parents.

Listen to your teachers.

Listen to your pastors.

Listen.

Listen.

Listen.

All good.

We need to learn.

But what are we DOING with that knowledge?

Are we taking risks?

Sharing Christ?

Filling a need when we see one?

Coming alongside those who are lonely?

Coming alongside those who are burdened and/or overwhelmed?

It’s so easy to go to bible studies.

Stay held up in our little groups.

Noses stuck in our bible, dictionary and/or concordance.

Marinating on the Greek and Hebrew.

But never DOING anything with all that He teaches us.

Scripture is clear.

Our works do NOT save us.

Our works, through the power of the Holy Spirit, show the world WHO saved us.

So when your husband says, “Hey babe, Can I go to Sudan?”

You say, “OK.”

To see convictions made real?

Nothing more awesome.

Even when your mom calls in a panic to tell you about a friend of a friend’s daughter’s sister
who got attacked “somewhere in Africa.”

Thanks, Mom.

So Dave is convicted.

I am convicted.

And now hopefully YOU are convicted.

Have fun.

Kayla’s home “sick.”

And was miraculously cured a few minutes ago.

So we’re off to go wash the dog.

In years past, it’s always been about us.

Dave and I.

Making plans.

Making reservations.

And scrambling to find the last available sitter.

This year was different.

An outpouring from our hearts that reflects Who we love and serve.

An emphasis placed on what matters.

During church service on Sunday we spent some time praying for these precious women.

Women who have seen their Valentine go to be with Jesus.

Far right is my grandmother.

After service, we visited a local nursing home.

Hope Kids passed out flowers and handmade Valentine’s.

And gave treats to the nursing staff.

Ashlyn wished ever single resident, asleep and awake:

“Happy Bahhh-lentine’s Day!”

KK diligently prepared Valentine’s for her classmates.

“Fun Dip for the girls because they are fun.”

“Nerds for the boys because, well, you know…”

I kind of hope she always thinks that way.

And stays little forever.

My friend hosted a party for the kids on Tuesday.

Shirt and cookie decorating.

Red and pink food and treats.

So sweet and thoughtful.

Thank you, Carrie!

This Valentine’s Day I was reminded that Christian love is about sacrifice.

We’ve been given so much.

We’ve no choice but to give back.

It’s not enough to have the right words.

Or perfect behavior.

But we must LOVE.

And care for God’s people.

In word AND deed.

I plead with Jesus on a daily basis for compassionate hearts in my children.

And I know they learn by watching me.

So I am continually challenged to live accordingly.

To find creative ways to show God’s love to God’s people.

On and around February 14th.

And other days, too.

Sometimes I wonder if it was all our fault.

And we made shirts.

WITH. HIS. FACE. ON. THEM.

I still get a little sick to my stomach when I think about it.

Soon thereafter, he announced a sabbatical, went all Francis Chan on us and disappeared off the face of the earth.

And I can’t help but wonder if our mad screenprinting skills made this humble, simple preacherman run far, far away.

Anyway, he’s BACK!

Tweeting.  Preaching.  Blogging.

And I’m about as happy as my husband in this picture.

Because I adore him.  But not more than Jesus.  Promise.

________________________

And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks by night.

An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them.  They were terrified.

But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid.  I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all people.

Today, in the town of David

a Savior has been born to you.

He is Christ the Lord.  This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.

Luke 2:8-12